The Legacy of War: Wisdom for My Loved Ones (Revisited)

About 2 1/2 years ago, I posted a story I called "The Legacy of War: Wisdom for My Loved Ones." Our then president (in lockstep with his vocal VP) and military leaders were calling for a "surge" strategy in Iraq. Today, our generals in Afghanistan, right-wing commentators, and conservative politicians are saber-rattling about the need for a new "surge" of troops, putting pressure on our new president to send 40,000 or more troops to war (which President Obama called "the right war" during his presidential campaign). At least this time around , our new VP is calling for different strategy.

The issue got my full attention after viewing a debate on PBS about the Afghan "surge" strategy between retired Army General Jack Keane and retired Army Colonel Andrew Bacevich, an international relations professor at Boston University who spent twenty-three years serving in the US Army (then recently reading an article titled "The Generals' Revolt: The Military Revolt Over Afghanistan" by Robert Dreyfuss in Rolling Stone).

So what does this have to do with life legacies (and my own life legacy in particular)? While the Afghan war likely will not have a direct effect on my two sons (in their 30's), my young grandchildren could eventually be impacted by the eight-year and "no end in sight" war in Afghanistan. That would make it all too personal whether or not I'm still alive when that war or some other new war ends.

Having lived through the Vietnam era as an Army Reservist (see my previous blog post on war), the Afghan war is certainly echoing (if not repeating) our experience in Vietnam. The word "quagmire" (the word most often used about the Vietnam war) has even reappeared in the news, spoken by no less than President Obama in a recent interview.

As I noted in "The Legacy of War," the most powerful words of wisdom I've ever heard about war were delivered by Chris Hedges, author of the 2002 book, "War Is A Force That Gives Life Meaning," in a speech he gave:

"War in the end is always about betrayal: betrayal of the young by the old, soldiers by politicians, and idealists by cynics."

I would add "betrayal of presidents by military leaders (and retired generals)" -- as it appeared to me during the Vietnam War and certainly does now.

I was born at the end of World War II in which my father served and was wounded in France. He survived but never spoke to me about his wartime experience. By my count, the U.S. has been at war in some country for more than half the years of my life. What does that say about America and the human psyche? I don't have an answer but it's clear to me that there's truth in the statement that "you don't make peace by making war."

What I do know for sure is that far too many young men and women will be killed and wounded in Afghanistan (as they were/are in Iraq) in a "surge" or any military strategy of escalation. And that will be a terrible waste of life to protect a country from being a "safe haven for terrorists." Plus, I wonder about the extraordinary level of arrogance it takes to expect our military to change a tribal culture, much less "win" any war against insurgencies and gangsters intent on terrorizing the "free world."

How do you view the legacy of war in your lifetime? What are your personal stories about war and its impact on you and your family members? Have you changed your views during your lifetime on the necessity (or lack of) for war ... in Korea, Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, and/or any terrorist organizations?

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Reflections of a Life Legacy Blogger

When I began writing this blog in early April of 2006, I wasn't sure where it would lead me. It was my first blog and I had just begun helping people create their own ethical wills. As I look back over the past 3 1/2 years, I've posted 142 times -- most of which were written in the first two years. Other work projects, including writing blogs for the Emerald Art Center, the Springfield Beacon, and Wellsprings Friends School, have reduced the time I've been able to devote to this blog.

It's a bit amazing to look at the data on who has read the life legacy blog since July 2006 when I started keeping track. As of today, there have been 4,499 visitors from 82 countries and all 50 states in the U.S. (a little less than half of the total visitors were from the U.S.). Just a little over 25% of visitors returned to the site. There have been 6007 visits and 11,315 page views. Visitors have looked at an average of 2.20 pages per visit and spent an average of 2.04 minutes on the site (the longest visit was 26.10 minutes).

The state of Oregon accounted for 1338 visitors who spent an average of 4.07 minutes on the site. They came from 36 cities throughout the state, most from the Eugene and Portland areas.

Among the 10 most popular posts are:

1. Writing A Personal Legacy Letter (accounted for 12% of total visits)
2. Examples of Ethical Wills
3. Life Lessons: The Power of Empathy
4. "Just a Mom, Writing About Life"
5. Pema Chodron's Commentary on the Four Reminders
6. Topic Outlines for An Ethical Will
7. Seven Questions to Explore in Your Ethical Will: "Who Am I?"
8. Spiritual Will & Ethical Will: Are They Different?
9. Life Lessons: A Quote to Remember
10.Writing a "Dying Letter": Elizabeth Edwards Story

Not long after starting the blog, I created a website describing my services for people interested in life legacies. For individuals who wanted to create their own ethical-spiritual will, I added a Wiki to my website with starter questions to consider.

Looking ahead, I intend to continue posting about personal life legacies, ethical-spiritual wills, and other related subjects including brief reviews of books I read during the year.

As always, your feedback and comments are welcomed.

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Life Lessons: Solitude and Silence

This week I read Anne LeClaire's new book, Listening Below the Noise: A Meditation on the Practice of Silence. The book describes her experience of practicing total silence on two Mondays each month for over seventeen years.

In LeClaire's chapter on "Nourishing the Creative Self," I appreciated what she says about the power of imagination:

"Today our imaginations are under siege by a constant barrage of noise and busyness. Our culture regards solitude and silence as something to be avoided. We would rather scrub grout than spend expended time alone.

A high cost comes from this. We have lost the path by which we journey to the place deep within where dreams and stories and visions appear. As Picasso noted, solitude is necessary for this work. In silence's calm surrounds, we discover the power of imagination and throw open the gates to creativity. In the opulent luxury of solitude, time becomes elastic and creative impulses surface and are allowed room to breathe. Sitting quietly, we gently enter our own inner worlds. Daydreaming, Woolgathering. Lost in space. These are rich and fertile activities. The playgrounds of imagination."

Thankfully, at this stage of my life I have many hours of solitude each week -- some of the time in silence (but never full days like the Ms. LeClaire). Knowing how important solitude is for nourishing my creativity and inner life, I may well give the author's practice of silence a try. I definitely want to reduce the noise and distractions in my life and would welcome an upsurge in creativity. Her experience transformed her life, igniting her creativity and fostering new connections with others, with herself, and with nature.

I enjoyed reading about Anne LeClaire's discoveries from answering an unexpected call to "Sit in silence." Now the question for me is "When will you start?"

If you decide to read the book, please send along your comments. Or share your experiences of silence and solitude.

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Life Lessons: A Quote to Remember

I've been away from the blog for quite awhile devoting much of my time over the past 10 months to outreach work for an alternative high school (where I've been blogging!). When I came across this quote from Eckhart Tolle in the "Sunbeams" section of The Sun (Aug. 2009), I decided to add it to my postings on life lessons:

"Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment."

I've recognized the wisdom in this quote much later in my life than I would have liked to have "gotten it." At least now I'm getting closer to "at this moment" in knowing why I'm having an experience in my life ... whether I like or not!

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Lessons from the Worst Buddhist in the World

This week I finished reading Mary Pipher's new book, Seeking Peace: Chronicles of the Worst Buddhist in the World. The book is a memoir that explores the lessons of her life, including her "meltdown" after the huge success of her book, Reviving Ophelia.

Near the end of "Seeking Peace," Pipher offers an instructive view of her life questions:

"My questions about my life are all of our eternal questions: How can we best develop our gifts and use them to help others? How can we keep growing until we stop breathing? How can we stay present? How can we be happy? The answers are universal answers: Pay attention, tell the truth, be kind, and find things to appreciate and enjoy every day. Try to learn something from everyone. Be open to wonder."

If you are a "fan" of Mary Pipher's writing and have read any of her books (Another Country: Navigating the Emotional Terrain of Our Elders, The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families, Writing to Change the World, and others), you'll find her candid and moving account of her life so far (at age 60) a worthwhile book to put on your summer reading list.

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Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die

I came across this video that features "five secrets" for living from a book by John Izzo. The book is based on the successful Biography Channel television series "The Five Things You Must Discover Before You Die." While I haven't read the book yet, the video shares the essence of the author's findings with beautiful visuals.



I plan to read the book and will write a review of it in a future posting. If you saw the television series or have read the book, I'd appreciate your comments.

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Tribute to a Mentor: John Woodrow

Yesterday, I learned about the sudden death at age 59 of a man who hired me 10 years ago to work with him to help provide employment for adults with developmental disabilities. At the time, I had been self-employed for a dozen years and felt ready for a change as I approached my mid-50s. John Woodrow took the risk of hiring this "older guy" to join him at the non-profit organization.

A front page story about John in the Register Guard told much about the public side of his life. He was truly a public servant, devoted to his adopted community. The story on the Springfield Times website offered a more personal look at his life from people who were his friends.

I had the privilege of working with John for nearly three years. Over the years since then, we saw each other at community business meetings and spoke on the phone several times (usually when I was asking him to be a reference for me, which he always graciously agreed to do).

During our years of working together, what I remember most about John was his fairness, inventiveness, and clear communications style. Once, when the executive director at the time was attempting to place blame on me for a sales slump during a difficult time for the non-profit, John backed me up and saved my job -- at least for a little while. John's proposals for making changes to the production operations (which would have opened the door to significant sales opportunities) were met with deaf ears by the executive director. And John ended up getting "cut loose" from the organization a few months before I was. All turned out for the better for both of us (and for the organization when their Board hired a new executive director).

I loved John's inventiveness in creating ways for developmentally disabled people to produce and package products for our business clients. He would play around with various "jigs" and other contraptions that made it possible for the jobs to get done. John was also a "grand master" of spreadsheets. Yes, spreadsheets. He designed ways to capture and analyze production and cost data that must have taken many hours to create on his computer. His understanding of production operations and business management was exceptional.

John was a "no B.S." kind of guy from Wisconsin. You always knew what he stood for and where he stood on issues. While he and I were far apart politically, I always supported his election and reelection to public office because I knew he was a "straight shooter" with a heart of gold. His contributions to his community (and the accolades he received and richly deserved) over just 12 years in Springfield were "awesome" in the truest sense of the word.

As I reflect on my time with John, I think the most significant thing he showed me through the way he lived and worked was the importance of "showing up fully-prepared and ready to make a meaningful contribution" to whatever you've chosen to do in your life. While not a new life learning for me, it is one that John demonstrated so well and so completely that I won't ever forget it.

May all the many friends and colleagues of John Woodrow celebrate him for the contributions he made to our lives and our community. I'll miss him.

PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Murphy/Springfield Times

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ADDENDUM

I attended the Celebration of Life for John on May 1oth, along with hundreds of other people. Speakers included several public officials who celebrated John's service to our community, his faith, his love of family, friends, and his dogs, and his gentlemanly way of being in the world.

Among his many forms of service, John was a champion for the K-9 dogs employed by our police department. It touched me to see three of their dogs sitting next to a standing policeman throughout the celebration.
And what looked like our whole police force was sitting in two rows ahead of me along the the Chief who spoke about John's support of policing in Springfield.

While I could say much more about the service, I prefer to post a couple of the photos of John from the program. Thanks also to John Rodney Woodrow, III -- his son -- who posted a comment about our blog posting.